SchoolisHard

Nobody has to be a stranger. Whether or not you have a lot in common with somebody doesn’t matter. If you want to be friends with somebody, all you need to do is ask the following questions at the appropriate times. I put them in order as much as possible, but sometimes situations will arise where you need to mix them up.

I wish you the best of luck in building new friendships.

1. Would you mind giving me your contact info so I can get in touch with you?

It is vitally important to make the most of a first encounter. By not getting somebody’s contact information the first time you meet them, you are setting a friendship up for failure. If you just met somebody by chance, this is even more vital. Chance encounters are often just that, chance. You may never see this person again if you don’t have a way to get in touch.

2. What do you usually do when you aren’t in school or working?

People want to tell you what they are up to. Ask them to find out.

3. Where would you like to go?
4. What would you prefer?
5. Do you want to leave?

These three questions are going to come up often. A friendship is give and take. Both you and your new acquaintance need to be honest with each other and be willing to compromise often.

6. What are some things you are really good at?
7. Can you teach me?

One of the best ways to get close to somebody is to show interest in something they do well. By having them show you how it’s done you have an opportunity to spend lots of time getting to know each other.

8. Can you help me?

This question is especially useful when you need help with something which directly utilizes a talent of your new friend. Asking for somebody else’s help affirms them and makes them feel worthy. (Make sure you aren’t just being lazy.)

9. What was your favorite teacher like?
10. Who do you admire the most?
11. If you could make a living doing anything, what would it be?
12. Where will you be 10 years from now?

These four questions are really important “getting to know you” questions. The person’s answers show you what qualities they admire most in people, how much they tend to plan, and more.
13. Want me to help?
14. Mind if I show you?

These questions are similar, but they have different connotations.

“Want me to help?” refers to things that haven’t happened yet such as moving out or helping to organize a party.

“Mind if I show you?” is used for more immediate situations such as when you both are working on a homework assignment. Make sure you know the person won’t mind accepting your help. If the problem involves something your friend is usually good at, it may hurt his/her pride to take your help.

15. Who is your favorite family member?

A question like this is much better than asking something like, “So, what does your Dad do for a living?” This avoids accidentally bringing up somebody’s dead parents, foster home experience, or his/her adoption.

16. Does voting matter?
17. Is being rich bad?
18. What happens when we die?
19. What’s the happiest moment of your entire life?

These questions are saved as late as possible because they are very opinion-base, deep, and usually involve a person’s core values and life experiences. Once you are sufficiently close to somebody, you should feel comfortable asking these questions at the appropriate times. Don’t expect one answer in particular, and definitely don’t offer a rebuttal. If they ask for your answers, give them politely. Be willing to agree to disagree and continue being friends.

20. You know what I like about you the most?

This is the best way to tell your friend everything you like about them. It’ll make his/her day.