SchoolisHard

Holding an office in student government looks good on any application whether it be for college, work, or otherwise. The catch is that your leadership skills are not going to get you elected. Much like every other system which requires the votes of fickle teenagers, winning is a popularity contest. If you have few friends, it is still possible to win by planning ahead and being careful how you present yourself. I am going to approach this from the standpoint of somebody who is already in college, but most of the information will apply to high school students as well.

It is imperative that you start planning early. This is especially important if you have a rather limited social network. If you plan on running for an office, go ahead and set your sights on which one in the Spring so that when Fall rolls around you will be prepared.

Some of these are extreme, but I am just giving you lots of options. Do whatever you think is best.

Here is your plan of attack:

Neutralize Yourself

Being yourself simply doesn’t cut it in politics. I am not suggesting you lie about what you believe in, just don’t take any stance too strongly unless there is no question that it is held by a large majority of voters at your college. You want to appeal to as many students as possible.

For internet profiles, take an iron hand to any damning information potential voters are likely to see. Delete your political views, whether or not you smoke/drink, or any other thing about yourself which would make somebody not want to vote for you. Don’t forget to remove pictures that portray you in a negative light. When listing your favorite types of music, say you like all music but single out one particular genre that you dislike. This makes you seem open-minded but still capable of making decisions. (I recommend country, rap, or hip hop depending on what students at your college seem to have a preference for.) For books, don’t be too pretentious. Most people AREN’T smart students like you, so err on the side of humility. If you actually like it, especially if you go to a Christian college, be sure to add the Bible.

Think About Your Name

*NOTE*: If tons of people already know you, ignore this one.

If your name is Zachary Young, you will statistically get fewer votes than a person named Andrew Adams. Human beings tend to pick the first choice in a ballot when they don’t know anybody. Consider how this may or may not affect your chances to win and consider using your middle, maiden, or step-parent’s name. It may seem negligible or a bit over the top, but if you are serious about this then why not? (TIP 1: Don’t legally change your name to something. One man legally changed his middle name to “low-tax” and still lost the election.)

Use Technology to Network

Using Facebook, Myspace, and any other popular social networking website, begin making acquaintances. This doesn’t have to be anything too intensive, simply a comment and a message every week or so concerning a similar interest or something which you find interesting about them. People love being affirmed in this manner, and they will remember your name when the time comes to vote.

If you want people to find you, take a look at some bands, movies, or books the majority of people at your college like. If you enjoy them too, go ahead and add them to your profile.

Once you are buddy-buddy with these people, it is your call whether you meet them in person or not. If you are not good at first impressions, it might be in your best interest to keep it online until after the election.

Join Clubs and Social Groups

First, see if you should join a fraternity/sorority. There is really no better way to quickly make tons of friends on a college campus. Your brothers and sisters will willingly be your personal campaign managers. Frat people have amazing people skills, too, so their social networks will be expansive and useful. If you don’t think you can stomach a frat, take a look at some other groups on campus. Find those which interest you and get involved. You won’t have as many opportunities to meet people as those taking the plunge into Greek life, but you will still build strong relationships and earn some votes.

Don’t be Annoying

Above all, don’t beg for votes. Also, don’t hand out stickers or force candy down anyone’s throat. Feel free to have these items on hand, but let people ask you for them. Making your own online group and sending out hundreds of invites may seem like a quick way to market yourself, but it really just pisses people off. Gently put the word out by posting a blog, or change your picture to something that lets people know you are running for something. For conversation, casually let people know you are running when it comes up. “You voting in that election next Tuesday?” To which you reply: “Yeah, I’m such a jerk. I always vote for myself.” Which brings me to my next point…

Be Funny.

You may be serious about the election, but don’t let anybody know that. I’ve never actually tried this, but something like starting a slander campaign against yourself would probably get you elected in a student election. A banner or two telling people not to vote for you because you are a witch would get you more votes than a poster telling your ACT score. Make ‘em laugh, make ‘em vote.

Look Good. Really Good.

We’re only human. One of my favorite examples of this is a debate between Kennedy and Nixon. Of those who only listened to the radio, a majority said Nixon won; however, those who saw the television version said it was clear that Kennedy won. Looks aren’t everything, but if you’ve got it flaunt it. If you don’t, use angles and lighting to your advantage so people think you do. (TIP: Don’t go all out with a wool suit, parted hair, and all of that mess. Looking good doesn’t mean looking like you are running for president. Keep it classy, but act your age.)

Don’t Worry About Tacky-Looking Posters

All you need are a few large posters with a great looking picture and a message stating your intended office. If you look at the way people in actual government do their posters, it often just involves one or two colors, a name, and the office. Students who aren’t running don’t give a damn about the election, so make your stuff short and sweet.

Don’t Compete Against Your Friends

This is simple. If you are running for something, none of your friends should be running for it either. Either diplomatically pick a new office or flip a coin.

Ask Professors to Remind Students to Vote

Only do this for professors that have students that may vote for you. Make sure your name is not mentioned or this will seem like annoying begging.

When the election comes, you will be pleased with all of your hard work. You’ll have made new friends and probably learned a little about yourself. The results matter, but whether you win or lose you are going to learn skills that will serve you for the rest of your life. Good luck, and please let me know how everything works out; I’d love to hear about it.